A couple(t) of winters

Autumn left yesterday
Through that little space
Under the door.
But it hasn’t left
My heart yet.
Is there no room
Under my door
Or have I lost
The key?
Anyway
I feel the cold more
Because I still have autumn
Inside.
Sad part is
When I do finally
Let winter in,
I will be required
To actually accommodate
Spring.
How can I be expected
To bloom
When my heart is cold
Or vice-versa.
And be furious
When I am really in full-bloom.
Maybe I am running
One season behind.
How?
It probably happened
When I moved from
The north to
The south.
And had a couple of
Successive winters.
Such emotional lags
Can last years.
But what if they
Go on for a lifetime?
Skin and bone
Expectations and Intentions
Words and Thoughts
Are never reconciled?
I will dwell between them
And be neither the snow
That melts
Nor the water that
Freezes.